Sunday, August 30, 2015

The Pitch

So in this grand world of writing, there is often the need to have a pitch. Different people/publishers require different things it seems. The current one I'm playing with needs a pitch outlining the story concept, plot, characters, conflict and setting - in 100 words or less. After writing tens of thousands of words, that seems so little.

How do you get all the drama and emotion into something that short? I have no clue, but here are six takes I've been working on. There's a poll underneath them that I'd greatly appreciate knowing which one sounds the best, or if they all sound like crap. This is a new aspect of writing for me, so I'm learning and won't be offended at all if I'm going down the wrong path.

1.
Being set up with a date by her dad was the last thing Casey Holcomb needed. Learning to tell him no was on her to-do list, but first she had to make it through the annual breast cancer fundraiser they held in one piece.

As a star hockey player, Dylan Jones had more female attention than he knew what to do with, but none of it was from the woman he’d dubbed his number one fan. Having Casey as a date was a dream come true. The only problem was that he needed to convince her she shared the dream.



2.
Dylan Jones had almost everything. He was the star player on his hockey team and the line of women vying for his attention seemed endless. His face was even on the cover of a video game. What Dylan didn’t have was the woman of his dreams, and finding her in a sea of fans proved to be an insurmountable task.

Casey Holcomb’s dad didn’t usually butt into her business, and because of that she had trouble telling him no. When he sets her up with a date for the breast cancer fundraiser they host, Casey’s life is turned upside down.



3.
As a star hockey player, Dylan Jones didn’t have a problem finding women willing to spend time with him. The problem was he wanted the woman who didn’t mince words when she yelled what she thought of his skills during every game. He just had to find her.

Casey Holcomb decided at a young age she didn’t have time for men and the games they played. Work and health issues were more than enough to keep her mind occupied, but when her father sets her up on a date, Casey quickly learns maybe there is something missing from her life.



4.
A family history of breast cancer has Casey Holcomb’s attention divided between work and her health, leaving little time to deal with relationships. When her dad decides to set her up, she’s not happy about his interference, but she can’t tell him no.

As a star hockey player, Dylan knows it’s hard to find someone who’s interested in you based on who you are and not the fact that your face is on the cover of a video game. Meeting Casey is a dream come true for him. He just needs to prove to her that she shares the dream.



5.
When you’re set up on a date with one of the city’s most eligible bachelors, you become a hated woman. Casey Holcomb finds that out quickly while dancing at a charity ball in Dylan Jones’ arms. People didn’t understand there were more important things on her mind than being wooed by Dylan.

Dylan, on the other hand, was thrilled to be Casey’s date. As a star hockey player, women threw themselves at him all the time, but she was different. Dylan knew she was worth every second it took to win her over. He just hoped it wouldn’t take years.



6.
He’s a star hockey player. She’s his biggest critic.

Casey Holcomb’s taunts during hockey games don’t necessarily mean she hates Dylan Jones. She just hates that every unattached female in the stands seems to be in love with him. For her, there are much more important things to focus on, like work and her health.

After being set up on a date by Casey’s dad, Dylan uses the opportunity to try to win Casey over. Will her stubbornness and the army of women vying for Dylan’s attention stand in their way, or will Casey learn that happy endings aren’t fantasies?

polls